The Low Down on Lube

I was walking down the isle of my favorite drug store the other day and realized that there are a lot of different types of lubes out there on the market today.  We really have come pretty far since I was a youngster and wondering why my mother and father for that matter had a HUGE jar of Vasoline next to their bedside table. I thought as I got a bit older “Why do they need it on both night stands?” –Shrug, O-well.

So as promised I will be going over the different types of lubes on the market today. What they are good for, texture, aftermath factor, overall price which to choose and why. 

So let’s get slickery shall we and slidddde on into the topic….

Water-Based Lube

This is the most common lube on the market and is compatible with all of your toys no matter what the material type. It is the most budget friendly of all that I will be talking about as well. All lubes in this category, including the flavored lubes, are condom friendly. No risk in breakdown. They are smooth and slick but most contain a propylene glycol which can be irritating to some women and cause yeast infection if prolonged use. They are water-soluble which means the skin and mucous membranes in the vagina or anus will absorb them quickly so several applications will need to be made for any marathon sessions. Since it is water-soluble clean-up is a breeze, just rinse and go.

IN SUMMARY

*Budget friendly
*Wide Variety Including Flavored
*Toy and Condom Friendly
*Clean up easy

Silicone Based Lubricants

This lube is much more slippery and last much longer and is non-irritating. It is not water-soluble which means this is great for water play and no I don’t mean Golden Showers… or maybe if your into that type of thing. Since they are thinner and not water-soluble a little goes a long way. It is a good thing too because even a small bottle of this precious liquid can be quite costly. So if your cat decides to climb up on the bedside table and become a voyeur in your marathon love making session, make sure you put the lid on it. Nothing is worse than stopping mid-orgasm because your 1.7 oz,$20.00 bottle of  lube is slowly dripping down the side of your nightstand because your cat decided that watching you was as about as exciting as watching paint dry. But I digress….

Not being water soluble also means that clean up isn’t as easy. An extra towel maybe nice when using this type of lube and a shower is most definitely going to be needed afterwards. Another down side to silicone lubes is they do not play well with silicone toys. They are safe on latex however.

IN SUMMARY

*Priciest of all the lube categories
*Condom Friendly
*Toy friendly UNLESS IT IS MADE OF SILICONE *so Silicone to Silicone NO GOOD THIS IS
*Great Water play lube
*Can be a bit messy and hard to clean up

Oil Based Lubes

JUST DON’T USE THEM PERIOD! Okay that was a little harsh but let me explain. Oil lubes will corrode latex so they are not condom safe. They are also REALLY bad for a vagina and anus as they help breed bacteria. So I REALLLLLLLLY hope my parents used that Vaseline to soften their feet at night.  Baby oil, Vaseline, Crisco, Body Lotions these are all oil based. Although they last a while in viscosity they should really only be used for body massages and MAYBE a happy ending for the guy if ya want. Above and beyond that DON’T USE IT!

IN SUMMARY

*JUST DON’T USE IT!

Well those are your basics… I could go into all the other types of other ones out there like Edible Lubes (water based mostly). Spermicidal Lubes (usually water-based) have a main chemical of nonoxynol 9 or N-9 which helps immobilize sperm. Down side in order to be effective a woman has to insert it 10-15 min before having sexual intercourse.                            Yaaawwwwnnnnn....

 Yeah my thoughts exactly sister. 

There is a Hybrid Lube that is a mix between Water and Silicone that people are leaning more towards because it isn’t as pricey as the pure Silicone but overall the same rules apply as the Silicone.

Warming Lubes (mostly water based) can be alright just make sure you read the label before placing anywhere near the vaginal area especially if they are flavored. They may contain higher amounts of glycol which means higher chance of yeast infection. But again GREAT for massages. 

Warming, tingling , desensitizing and shrink lubes fall more under the enhancement category although they CAN be used as lube.  However!!! I will not condone desensitizing cream for anything other then putting on an erection before you place a condom on. This will keep your Johnson at bay and the desensitizing cream from your woman’s lady parts so she will not become desensitized… Gawd knows we need all the stimulation we can get! Am I right? Can I get a witness!

As for using it on women…. Well I only advise desensitizing cream for women for plucking of eyebrows, getting a Brazilian wax or if you are getting a tattoo of some sort. Other than that no other reason. Ladies or Gentleman (we will discuss anal play with you guys at a later blog) if you use it for Anal play I will release the hounds of hell on you.  Okay maybe…

But let me tell you this. Pain is there for a reason. If you are trying anal sex for the first time and you need a desensitizing cream then you’re not doing it right. You haven’t stretched enough or you’re going too fast. For whatever the reason LISTEN TO YOUR BODY and your partner. If you use desensitizing cream and he is tearing tissue in there it could really do some damage you would never know it. Same for the guys.

And Shrink Cream!!!!! For ALL THAT IS RIGHT AND WRONG WITH THE WORLD

 NOOOOOOOOOOO

Ladies! If you don’t feel like your all that tight down there anymore for WHATEVER reason please please please please please do not fall prey to the advertisements of shrink cream or Chinese shrink cream. The number one ingredient in this product is Alum! It is a known FACT that 1 ounce of this stuff ingested could kill a full grown adult! What it does is takes all the water out of the cells so the tissue swells causing shrinkage. It is not permanent and there have been no studies on the effects to a woman’s vaginal walls or cervix. But it cannot be good at all.
So Ladies you want things to be tighter and in tip top shape down there? Exercise. And you can even do it with weights called Ben Wah Balls and Kegel exercises … there is even an APP FOR THAT! That is right Folks. It is called Kegel Camp click here to get it. It is for the best exercise for both men and women to do in order to have better sex and strengthen that old PC muscle.

Well I hope we have learned a little bit today and don’t forget to take the poll over on the left hand side.

Leave your comments and feed back if you will or let me know what you think by emailing me at mppbynikki@gmail.com. And visit my website at www.mypurepleasure.com/1104. While your there purchase some nice lube.

Happy Sex ya’ll !